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What happened when the nasty monster went shoplifting?
He stole a free sample.
What happened when the nasty monster stole a pig?
The pig squealed to the police.
What happened when the big, black monster became a chimney sweep?
He started a grime wave.
What do you call a huge, ugly, slobbering, furry monster with cotton wool in his ears?
Anything you like - he can't hear you.
How do you know if a monster is musical?
He's got a flat head.
What do you call a mammoth who conducts an orchestra?
Tuskanini.
What aftershave do monsters wear?
Brute.
How can you tell if a monster hays a glass eye?
Because it comes out in conversation.
What did one of the monster's eyes say to the other?
Between us is something that smells.
What happened when a monster fell in love with a grand piano.
He said, "Darling, you've got lovely teeth."
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