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What did the footballer say when he accidentally burped during a game ?
Sorry, it was a freak hic !
Why are football grounds odd ?
Because you can sit in the stands but can't stand in the sits !
What do you get if you drop a piano on a team's defence ?
A flat back four !
Why did the goal post get angry ?
Because the bar was rattled !
What is the bank manager's favourite type of football ?
Fiver side !
What part of a football ground is never the same ?
The changing rooms !
What should a football team do if the pitch is flooded ?
Bring on their subs !
Did you hear about the football team who ate too much pudding ?
They got jellygated !
Ref:I'm sending you off
Player: What for ?
Ref: The rest of the match !
Why do artists never when they play football ?
They keep drawing !
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