Pick-up lines can be stupid, funny, and occasionally effective. Where the 2020s require greater authenticity, we often think of the 80s and 90s when remembering the hilarity of using pick-up lines. Anyone that ever watched Friends or Seinfeld remembers some epically funny pick-up lines.
Here’s a classic. George from Seinfeld goes up to a woman at the diner and says, “Excuse me, I couldn’t help but notice you looked in my direction.” The woman says, “Yes, I was looking at your food. You ordered the exact same thing as me.” George thinks for a second and replies, “My name is George, I’m unemployed, and I live with my parents.”
So there are many pick-up lines that might be just as bad, and you probably shouldn’t try them. In that Seinfeld episode, George is successful, making it hilarious, but don’t expect any of these next ten to go well.
Is your name Google? Because you have everything I have been searching for.
OK, it’s a little nerdy and certainly bold, but it makes you cringe, right? There is a slight chance it’d work for online dating instead of the totally horrific “Hi,” but it’s still a very slight chance.
I’ve lost the loving feeling. Will you help me find it again?
Using a Righteous Brothers song that was used as a pick-up line in Top Gun? No! Singing it like Top Gun? An even bigger no. Don’t expect this to go well unless your target has no clue about Top Gun.
I’m glad I have my library card because I’m totally checking you out.
Think about a guy with his disco shirt unbuttoned halfway down, chest hair peaking out, or a skateboarder that isn’t too bright in an early 90s movie. Do you have the vision yet? Yeah, that’s the same one she’ll have and that’s not a positive thing guys.
For the ladies, this could work on a guy. No male ego can resist being checked out.
If women were boogers, I’d pick you first.
Does this even need a comment? No it does not.
Baby, If we came to some agreement you’d be the fine print.
It could take the object of your affections a few seconds to associate fine print with fine. Not good. You need an immediate laugh. Also, it might be a little early for “baby” unless you are at a disco in 80’s Miami.
You’re so sweet; you’re giving me a toothache.
What’s a possible response to this? “How do you know I’m sweet?” It could work after chatting for a while though.
Do you know what’s on the menu? Me ‘N’ U.
Oh, it’s so bad. Doesn’t it make your soul ache that someone might say that? Also, if you say this, how does anyone know it’s the letters N and U?
Well, here I am. What are your other two wishes?
One possible answer is, “That you go away, arrogant fool.” Alladin will fulfill that.
The outfit looks great on you. It’d look even better at the foot of my bed.
No! Never! If you get slapped, don’t say you weren’t warned.
You know, I’m not really this tall. I’m just sitting on my wallet.
Unless you’re short and drinking the cheapest beer in the bar, this line only says arrogant and focused on all the wrong things. Abort, abort, abort!
Well, those are just ten of the worst. Indeed, it could go on and on. We are in an era of more sincerity and value, but flattery is still effective. Maybe tone it down a bit and just say, “You’ve caught my attention and I’d love to get to know you.”